What’s the worst name you’ve ever been called?

For those of us who were given names that became playground fodder, we share a common experience. The cruelty of the playground inevitably left us with a list of those gems, the damage from which stays with many of us long after childhood. However, remember that you are not alone in this.

Especially as “one of these things is not like the others,” those names were among the first snowballs starting the avalanche of shame, burying us with a paralyzing foundation of insecurity and low self-esteem, leaving us in those familiar “4 Fs” trauma responses: freeze (feeling stuck and unable to act), fight (responding with aggression or defensiveness), fawn (seeking approval and avoiding conflict), flee (escaping the situation).

And the fifth and only response we can intentionally invoke, and that allows us to remain and regain our own power: FIND.

FIND a friend. FIND a family member. FIND a therapist or counselor. FIND a community. FIND something that brings you joy and nourishes your soul. These are not just options, they are necessities for healing and growth. FIND an activity that helps you FIND your center and regain your balance. FIND something creative to do that expresses your inner experience, thereby transmuting that trauma energy out of your soul space and into your creations and efforts. FIND a hug! FIND someone with whom you can laugh!

It is with the spirit of that intention that I am introducing the Best Worst Names Ever Revolution, a movement where we reclaim the power of the names that once hurt us. By acknowledging and embracing these names, we take away their ability to harm us and instead use them as a source of strength and empowerment.

By naming those “worst names” and claiming them as our own, we reverse their negative power over us. This act of reclaiming our names is a powerful tool, diffusing the lingering energy of shame and anger that they imparted to us upon delivery. It's a step towards empowerment and self-acceptance.

My Top Three Worst Names:

• Ass-ley (in the obvious category)

• Witchypoo - Earned when I was six and told my fellow students who were being mean to me that I would turn them into frogs when I came into my powers at twelve. Witchypoo stuck with me until I left that school at thirteen. I LOATHED the name at the time, but have since enthusiastically embraced it as an adult!

• All-Time Win: The accidentally seen two-line ode composed to me by someone I thought was a friend, “Alien Pod Person from a Stupid Ball of Mud! I don’t know you, and you certainly don’t know me!!” (Name withheld to protect the guilty.) My mother remains offended.

My Marten (sic):

• All-Time Win: Five 1st-grade girls chanting, “Martin, Fartin’, Dolly Parton” from the top of the jungle gym.

• His highschool best friend’s girlfriend calling him “An, um… charming asshole.”

Come join the Revolution through merriment by leaving YOUR “worst name(s)” in comments below, tagged with #bestworstname as we collectively FIND OUR POWER!

With Love & Paint & Stardust,
Flying My Freak Flag High,
I remain,